Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Same Old Song and Dance



Though Martin Gerber is often mocked for looking, and occasionally playing like the Gerber baby, last night's match made him seem much more like the military knife of the same name. Not because he was sharp or precise, but because watching the Senators lose to the last-place Oilers so spectacularly was about as much fun as being stabbed with one of these.

And really, what can be said in anyone's defence? The entire offense was invisible, the defense gave up chance after chance, Elliott was his usual mediocre self, the crowd sounded flat (though, in fairness that may have just been Sportsnet). Hell, the only goal scored came off an Oilers defenseman's skate. And this wasn't exactly the Darth Gerber we all fell in love with for the two weeks where he was good in Ottawa -- he nearly scored on himself in the middle of the second, for christ's sake!
At this point, though, I'm at as much of a loss as anyone as to how this can be fixed or salvaged. Any trade at this point will be a reactionary one, similar to the Stillman-Commodore deal a few years back. Trading scraps for proven players seems unlikely at this point, and our assets are just too severely undervalued right now to get anything of worth. At the same time, though, something has got to be done. The team needs a shakeup. Some emotion. Anything.

We can always hope that Dany Douchebag's return on Thursday will spark some kind of emotion among the players. It's definitely got the fans going, obviously, and anti-Heatley stories are already popping up all over the Sun, Citizen and online with no sign of relenting until puck drop. Personally, I'm really looking forward to not only the game, but the fans' reactions as well. Something tells me that the Gap-Toothed Asshole will be getting more than just a shower of boos; fans boo players who did nothing wrong to us, like Chara and Havlat.
No, I'm expecting at least a few "Heat-ley Sucks" and "Fuck You Heat-ley" chants, maybe a couple of jerseys making their way to the ice, and it wouldn't surprise me to see an effigy of the overpaid whiny glory boy burning in front of SBP. Anything you guys want to see happen, aside from the obvious curb-stomping of the Sharks and their "all-star" winger who wanted more options that weren't Edmonton?

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